Teaching Emotional Literacy To Children


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The topic of how emotional literacy helps in achieving higher education, stronger relationships, and optimal health has been prevalent lately. Emotional intelligence is something that parents can teach their children. It is the person’s capacity to manage his emotions, while emotional literacy is his capacity to convey his emotions into words. But overall, both pertain to one’s ability to identify, comprehend, deal with and appropriately convey his emotions.

Can Children Learn To Be Emotionally Literate?

Definitely. In fact, some children are so in sync with how they feel that they will find it quite easy to handle various people and situations. Others may require more time and education to achieve this goal. Every child needs to be emotionally literate and they need to be encouraged and inspired to express themselves. By helping them learn, you are enabling them to traverse the not-so-good emotions appropriately and successfully.

What Can You Do To Help Them?

As a parent or guardian, you must:

  • Acknowledge your child’s feelings and their corresponding responses. Take time to think about his reactions and don’t judge right away. Do not criticize either. You can help him identify his emotions like telling him, “I understand that you’re annoyed,” or, “That’s wonderful! No wonder you’re so excited!”
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  • Encourage him to tell you how they feel. Try to create an atmosphere that’s safe and open so he can comfortably talk to you about his feelings. He should not feel any judgment from you, because if he will, he’ll look for others to open up. When he has confided in you, you can say something like, “Do you think she did the right thing,” or, “How does that make you feel?”
  • Identify the motivators that help him do his best. Praise is a good thing, but encouragement is better. Don’t focus so much on the outcome but applaud your child’s behavior and the strategy that he used to achieve his goal. You can encourage him by saying, “I’ve noticed that when the task gets more challenging, you don’t give up but you try even harder – that’s a great attitude.”
  • Teach your child other means of airing his frustrations. Let him know that he has a choice. Your question should be open-ended so he can freely answer you. Something like this: “How can you possibly express your anger or frustration through words and not by throwing things or hitting?” Or, “Can you think of something else that you can do to let your friend know that you are mad at him?”
  • Teach your child ways that would help calm him down when he is angry or sad or devastated. Let him practice the simplest, easiest, and most effective lesson – taking deep breaths. Additionally, you can teach him to memorize a mantra, like, “I can control my anger,” or, “I am calm.” Or you can ask him what makes him relax and to let him do it when he needs to, like watching television or playing a game.

Final Thoughts 


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When you have successfully taught, encouraged, modeled, and empowered children to become emotionally literate, you can be sure to watch them thrive and become versatile, confident, and well-balanced adults armed with a positive well being and way of life. Then you have given them the greatest gift.




Me To Therapist: Why Am I So Depressed?

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For me, it’s quite thoughtless for people to ask someone (me, for example) why he is depressed. From experience, I actually can’t find the exact words to answer the question, “Why are you depressed?” I’ve asked myself that too. “Why am I so depressed?” And the only answer that I can quickly think of is, “I don’t really know.” This has been my dilemma for weeks now, which I would like to ask a professional, a therapist. Why do people like me get depressed? Or how do we know for sure that we are suffering from depression?

Depression May Or May Not Have A Cause

People who are not very well educated about depression falsely think that someone can only be described as depressed if there is a valid reason or cause for him to suffer from depression. They don’t react so rudely if you just lost a job, experiencing grief from losing a loved one, or discovered that you have a chronic illness. These are for them justified enough for someone to be depressed ed.

However, most of us who are diagnosed with depression really can’t find a reason and a cause for feeling profoundly sad for long periods. Depression is frequently painful, and it is usually hard for people because they do not comprehend this part of the condition because again if no cause or impulse drives the depression, there is no cause for getting depressed. And for me, that is such a devaluing notion – for them to somehow tell me that I shouldn’t be feeling the way I’m feeling right now.

Depression Is Unintentional

Take it from me – depression is not something that I intended to suffer from. I didn’t voluntarily welcome it into my life, and I can’t just snap out of it if I want to get rid of it. If this were the case, then I wouldn’t need the help of a therapist, prescription meds, or other therapies. Just like any officially diagnosed medical condition, depression compels us to seek mental healthcare services so that we are taken cared of appropriately. Depressed individuals aren’t lucky enough to wake up the next day feeling energized and happy and able to say, “Yes, the depression’s gone!” NO. In fact, if they’re not treated, there’s nowhere else they’d rather be but in bed, alone and hopeless.

Depression And Sadness

All of us experience feeling sad or gloomy sometimes. A man may feel miserable for a week because he lost his favorite game. A woman may feel angry and blue over an argument she has with her best friend. Most likely, they will get over the hurt after a few days or a week, or maybe they won’t (and the hurt may progress to depression). For those who lost a job, went through a divorce, or diagnosed with cancer, the grief may be intensely distressing and may lead to depression.

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Depression happens when sadness becomes extreme, lasting for at least 2 weeks or even longer. The extreme sadness hinders one to normally perform his everyday activities like going to work, sleeping enough hours, or eating properly. Some depressed people think about ending their life because of too much guilt within them.

Depression Is Real But It Can Be Treated

Although one cannot get rid of his depression in just a wave of his hand, it can fortunately be cured or controlled through effective treatment. Such treatments include the use of antidepressants to suppress the overwhelming emotions that drive the individual to hurt himself. Psychotherapy is also one of the most efficient methods of teaching the individual various coping skills that would help him tackle his irrational depressive symptoms.

From the beginning of my treatment, I was surrounded with people who love and care for me and they are still with me until now as I am going through the struggle of trying to manage myself and heal from my past hurts. Having your loved ones with you makes the whole journey a lot easier.


The stigma around depression and other mental health disorders still persists worldwide. There is still reluctance that is associated with visiting a professional for mental health problems. It is unfortunate that depression is frequently seen as a weakness instead of something that is a major dilemma in the family and the community that needs attention and care.

People with depression who have not yet come forward about it are still suffering pointlessly. Suppressed emotions and unspoken concerns can worsen depression. It is indeed crucial for them to receive professional help.

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So is depression treatable? Yes, definitely. It is very possible, especially if the depressed individual gets competent medical and mental healthcare. Therapists, psychologists, and psychiatrists are among the professionals with a track record on knowledge, experience, and skill to walk these individuals through their journey towards healing and recovery.



How To Live A Happy Life

If there is one vital thing that you need to achieve in this life, it is finding yourself in a true state of happiness. You must be able to get the kind of life you deserve. It is essential for you to start finding ways on how you can accomplish pure bliss, despite the challenges and hardships that come your way. According to some famous psychologists, happy life can only be achieved if one starts to change his mindset or outlook about everything that he encounters daily.



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In this article, we are going to focus on providing you with some tips and tricks on how you can still become happier than ever. Here are the techniques that you must always remember:


Prioritize Self-Care


Before you do anything or make a decision, be sure that you think of your own welfare instead of others. It is not selfish to put your personal interests as a top priority. Stop thinking of what others may say because of your choices and actions. Instead, focus on improving yourself and attending to your needs. You will be surprised at how easy it can be on your part to be happy once you begin to do all these fantastic things.


Eat A Balanced Diet


As part of taking good care of yourself, it is ideal if you will start to stick into a balanced diet. Be sure to convince yourself in controlling your food intake so that you can live a healthy and fit lifestyle. Take note that poor food choices and lack of necessary nutrients can increase the health risks that you can encounter. At the same time, it can also make you vulnerable to viruses. When all these happen, you will start to become moody and cranky because of your medical condition.


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Be With The Right People


If you want to continue living a happy and exciting life, it is best if you will make an effort to surround yourself with the right set of people. Be with the kinds of friends who will lift you in times of troubles instead those who will celebrate your misery. It can be confusing to choose who your real friends can be, which is why you can take this process slowly and carefully. Do not rush into making friends, especially if you are not yet sure if you share the same values or preferences. Conversely, keep yourself away from toxic people so that you will not be affected by their negativity.


Follow Your Dreams


Stop living a life that is full of regrets. Instead, focus on knowing what you want to achieve and think of the proper ways on how to reach your dreams. Do not listen to the people who always make you feel that you are insufficient or that you are a failure. Instead, show them that you can be a fantastic individual who can turn his dreams into reality. Never stop the fight until you have reached the level that you have always wanted to be. Celebrate the little joys of life.


Focus On The Good


As already mentioned above, there are several instances in your life when you would come face-to-face to challenges. Instead of giving up because you experienced a setback, be sure to fight back and keep going. All that you must do is to focus on the good. Remember all the people, circumstances, events and things that you have in your life. Be thankful for their presence so that it will be easy for you to feel better about everything.


Take A Break


Another thing that you have to consider if you want to have a stress-free life is to learn the art of taking a break from anything or anyone that causes you anxiety and sadness. For example, if you believe that your work is already stressful on your part, then be sure to ask for a quick leave wherein you will go on vacation and spend some quality time with your family and friends. Aside from this, you can also simply rest at home away from your stressors.


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Happiness is not difficult to achieve as long as you know the correct things to follow. Make it a habit to smile and be grateful to attract more good vibes in your life.


How To Choose Sunglasses Based On Facial Structure


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You do not need the help of an offline or online therapy expert to find out the reasons why people wear sunglasses. Some use it mainly to protect their eyes from the glare of the sunlight; others wear it because they look good with them on or they match their outfit. Meanwhile, there are also individuals who put on sunglasses to exude a mysterious effect that draws even strangers toward them.

However, you should be aware of the fact that not all spectacles can look amazing on you. Some shades can make your face appear bigger or cause you to resemble someone from an alien planet. The reason is that you have to consider your face shape before investing your money to a pair of sunglasses. It is no different from when selecting your hairstyle, to be honest. In addition to that, high-quality spectacles do not come cheap; that’s why you have to ponder about it well.

Here are some ideas on choosing sunglasses based on your facial structure.

Round Face

If you have a face that is the same shape as Drew Barrymore’s, then I suggest that you get sunglasses that have rectangular lenses. That will offer the illusion of a narrower and thinner face, considering geometric frames make your facial features more defined and upturned structures allow the upper portion of your face to become more noticeable. And those who said that wearing black can make you look good all the time? Congratulate them because they are right. Try wearing spectacles that have black frames to make your face slimmer.


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Oval Face

For the women who have a face shape that’s similar to Julia Robert’s and Beyonce’s, think of yourself as a lucky individual. It is not only because your facial structure is almost the same as your idols’ but also because you can wear nearly all kinds of frames and lenses. The only exceptions are those overly large spectacles that can already cover your facial assets.

Oblong Face

Narrow-shaped faces like Sara Jessica Parker’s and Gwyneth Paltrow’s should opt for shades that have big lenses and thick frames. The latter will allow your face to appear shorter, while the former accentuates the top part of the face.

Square Face

Demi Moore and Brad Pitt are just two of the famous Hollywood celebrities who have strong, angular jaws. For those who have a face shape as they do, you will want to avoid geometric frames because they will make your face shape more pronounced. Instead, go for egg-shaped lenses, rounded, oval or sweetheart frames, and classic wayfarers, which may all soften or complement your robust features.

Diamond Face

People who have a face shape like Madonna’s are sometimes mistaken to have square jaws. In truth, however, diamond-shaped faces have smaller forehead and jaw, while the other one has a full forehead and a defined jaw. Diamond faces, for that reason, are supposed to wear sunglasses that have oval frames to match the shape, as well as upswept frames to accentuate the cheekbones. Turn your back on the sunglasses that have narrow frames because they can only make others focus to your narrow forehead.


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Triangle Face

Renee Zellweger has a slender forehead that widens until it reaches the chin. Those who have a face shape like this should wear sunspecs that have frame bottoms that are either curved inward or part-rimless to pronounce the top portion of the face.

Heart Face

The famous personalities who have this face shape are Jennifer Aniston and Reese Witherspoon. They look fabulous in spectacles that are oversized because it balances their facial features and makes their chins look more extensive than they genuinely are. Small, round frames are ideal for heart-shaped faces as well because they soften the appearance of a broad forehead.

Final Thoughts

Now, assess your face in front of the mirror thoroughly. What is its shape? How prominent are your cheeks, chin, and forehead?

I am quite sure that you already have formed an image of the perfect sunglasses that will suit your face shape at this point. The main thing that you ought to keep in mind is that you should not grab the first pair of spectacles that you see at the store. More than the price, the design or the brand, consider your face shape. That may help you to look as incredible as the Hollywood celebrities you idolize, especially with the sunglasses on.

Seeking An Online Therapist: Road To Better Self-Care

How much do you know yourself? Are you aware of your strengths and weaknesses? Can you identify when you need help or not? Often people forget how self-awareness eases our everyday troubles. By acquainting with yourself better, you’re more in tune with what your body wants and needs. Self-awareness is the ability to take a good, honest look at your life unattached and without bias, clearly able to tell between right or wrong. But an age where nothing is set in stone and the world doesn’t exist in purely black or whites, can you be self-aware? If not, then is it time to seek an online therapist as a second opinion?

Self-Awareness And Better Self Care

Why should you seek to develop self-awareness? Once developed, this allows you a broader world view. You can change your thoughts about topics you’d never think twice about in the past and will be able to adjust interpretations in your mind. Changing the understandings in your mind allows you to change your emotions. Self-awareness is one attribute of Emotional Intelligence and an essential factor in achieving success.

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Self-care is what happens when you have a sense of self-awareness. By understanding yourself better, you know what your body is feeling. Good self-care reduces overall anxiety and improves your mood. It also results in a better relationship with others, and of course, with yourself. However, this awareness does not come quickly to just everyone. Past traumas and different experiences contribute significantly to how we see ourselves and others. If you associate more with the latter, then how can you achieve self-awareness and practice self-care?

The answer lies in a traditional method recommended by psychologists and therapists: seeking help and beginning therapy. The stigma towards enrolling yourself in treatment should be eradicated. Seeking help for the betterment of yourself is a big step towards your personal growth and recovery. But because these misconceptions are still prevalent in our society at present, a lot of people refuse to seek therapy out of fear of judgment by others and out of embarrassment. Recent developments in the field of therapy, however, provide us with an alternative. The alternative? Online therapy.

What Is Online Therapy?

But what exactly is online therapy, and how will this lead you to better self-care and awareness? Online therapy, also known as e-therapy, e-counseling, teletherapy or cyber-counseling, is a relatively new development in mental health in which a therapist or counselor provides psychological advice and support over the internet. Support and therapy happen through email, video conferencing, online chat, messaging, or internet phone. Online therapy can occur in real-time, such as in phone conversations and online chat rooms, or in a time-delayed format, such as through email messages.

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Online therapy is accessible and a viable solution for the problem concerning the stigma against people who attend therapy. By conducting sessions via an online medium, patients can get counseling at the comfort of their own homes, free from judging eyes. If you want to learn more about yourself, seek guidance or a second opinion on just about anything that bothers you, consulting an online therapist might do you good. Wanting to learn more about yourself and making an effort to be attuned to your own needs is a good indicator of your self-awareness, and is a steady path towards regular self-care.

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As you explore yourself with the help of a counselor or a therapist, you have already begun practicing self-care. Similar to how our physical body needs treatment when we get sick, our minds also need to be well taken care of. This is true especially if you’ve noticed that something is wrong or out of place with yourself mentally. To live a truly healthy lifestyle, it is essential to pay attention to both your physical and mental health. Seeking out a therapist should not put you off. If you’re dreading meeting your therapist in person, or dislike the commute on the way to the office, or have a distrust for new situations altogether, online therapy is an option you can consider that might work for you.

Cheaper, accessible and convenient, online therapy gives you the power to choose how to make yourself feel better.

Why New York Therapists Are Challenged Every Single Day

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Almost 20% of adults living in New York City suffer from a mental health issue. That is 1 out of 5 adults which means, it could be you or workmate who has depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, a type of addiction, an eating disorder, or whatever else it is that people have to handle every day. But those who absorb all the stress (they call it challenges) are the therapists of these New Yorkers with issues.

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Know Yourself And Be More Aware

The thing that generally gets in our way in achieving something we hope and dream for our family and ourselves is actually “ourselves.” It seems like we can’t see it because we are not fully aware of our potentials. There is no self-awareness. But how would we know if we are confidently capable of doing something?

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Without self-awareness, no one is capable of looking into their failures and shortcomings. That is precisely the reason why we seem to ignore the blind spots. Meaning, the specific areas of our lives only run in circles. There are build-ups of tons of excuses and rationalizations of getting stuck within a particular situation because there is always a missing point. That is why in this articles, I will explain the truth of our mindsets that potentially decrease our level of self-awareness.

Lying To Yourself

The first thing to recognize in life is the ability to trust ourselves. That’s because the person that is most likely to lie to us beyond anyone else is specifically us. Since the mind contains a lot of stuff, it creates an idea that only we can determine if it’s something to believe in or not. It is what we call “ego defense mechanism” that automatically functions every time we doubt about ourselves. It is what keeps us safe and puts us in a survival perspective. Though it is something useful in some ways, it makes us behave differently. Meaning, if the things we do doesn’t fit our self-image, it moves us away from being who we are.

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When we don’t like the story our mind creates for us, we discount the evidence of each fact that we need to rely upon. Usually, it fits more when we are in a relationship that we are afraid to end. We unlikely admit that we somehow become the person who acts on things based on fear and self-doubt. What we do instead is refusing to listen to all convincing reasons which show us that our relationship will somehow never works. We then start to create tons of rationalizations for why those valid reasons don’t matter anymore. As a result, all the emotionally-charged areas of our lives become a bunch of lies.

Integrity Vs. Honesty

The second thing that helps us get through the fundamental truth we have to balance and accept is to consider honesty over integrity. We might find it counter-intuitive though because integrity is essential in life. That’s where we put value in something we do. But what appears to be the problem is the emotionally-charged areas of our lives that we are not capable of handling. Breaking through the significant situations becomes roughly hard. And because we already build an ego defense-mechanism in us that makes us stick to what we believe is usual, we get stuck. We’re not giving ourselves enough reason why we’re not approaching other options of betterment. Instead, we become doubtful in what we do, and therefore we choose to do stuff the hard way. That’s how we block ourselves from being honest because of the pressure we feel. We act immediately and choose integrity.

The best alternative to deal with this is by permitting ourselves to live paradoxically. We need to admit that there is something we must do to ensure better future decisions. There’s a need to emotionally create a leap and consider things one way or another. That’s because not all things we thought are normal are entirely the right ones. Sometimes, the other options become morally right for us without knowing it. So allowing ourselves to live life in full honesty is always the right decision.

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Looking On Disparities

We might exactly know what type of person we are or how good we are with our friends and family. However, there is a thing called “personality disparities.” We might consider ourselves valuing morality, but when we try to look carefully in the evaluation, we might see that there are not so many examples we can provide to prove that we behave in a highly moral way. We can admittedly say that there are tons of out of line behaviors that move us away from morality.

The point of knowing our disparities is to define our identity heavily. It is to get a perspective of who we are. Though sometimes we create a delusion of describing ourselves as someone who is loving, and caring, others might not agree to it. So to understand ourselves better, we need to sometimes rely on other people’s opinion about us. Ask them how we are with them and know things we often ignore about our personalities. They can immediately answer the question because they are capable of witnessing the stuff we don’t want to admit to ourselves.

Self-awareness is something we all have in ourselves. The aim for improvement, development, and impact relies on that particular attitude.

Thoughts Of A Woman About To Divorce Her Husband


I never imagined that I would be in this position right now. In my hand, I am holding five pieces of paper full of legal words and only one sign has caught my eye – divorce. I will be divorcing my husband of 20 years, and you know what, it pains me even after everything I’ve been through with him. These five pieces of paper hold what is to happen to my future. A tear fell which rolled on my cheek. I had to wipe it. There is no turning back now. I will be single again, after 20 years, as if it was so easy.

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