9 Situations When A Family May Need Family Counseling

Family is an essential connection that humans have from birth until our last breath. Even so, it is inevitable for families to experience problems, conflicts, and stress. The key to having a well-connected family is through understanding and identifying the needs of each individual. Family counseling is one of the several types of therapies that can help tackle those problems.

Here are some situations when a family may need to undergo family counseling:

Lack Of Communication  

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People tend to change as they grow older. In the dynamics of a family’s relationship, we need to adapt to how each of our family members changes and grows. Communication should flow freely and openly within the family.  When families don’t communicate these changes, it is impossible to reach an understanding of each other.

If you cannot share problems and opinions willingly to your family, who can you run to in times of distress? Family counseling can help the family look more in-depth into how they should be relaying their thoughts and emotions.

When Someone Hold Grudges

If a family member holds a grudge for a long time, it affects the entire family’s relationship. Family counseling can help resolve these conflicts within the family by understanding the perspective of the people involved. Containing and suppressing these feelings often result in unnecessary fights and miscommunications. Often, they will lash out at the person without them knowing the reason why.

Here are some reasons why families may form grudges against each other:

  • Parent/Child Conflict 

Parents often play such a massive part in the child’s earliest development. Thus, issues between parents and children can be especially emotional and deeply rooted.

  • Competition

Competition between siblings is unavoidable. It can get to a point where you may hurt each other’s feelings that can lead to a lifelong conflict.

  • Comparison

For a child, being always compared to their siblings or other children can be very stressful. They can hold grudges on this issue and may result in having low self-esteem and feeling of inferiority.

Neglect

Affection and emotional support are some of the bases of having an emotionally healthy family. Unfortunately, many parents become too focused on making a living to the point where they start neglecting their spouse and children. It’s also the same situation when children ignore their parents because they’re busy having fun with their friends.

If a family lacks attention and affection from each other, they will find other sources to fill that need. Children may turn rebellious, while your partner may look for affection in the arms of someone else. When issues like these arise, it is vital to seek a family counselor before it gets too late.

The Disconnected Family

Do your family members prioritize their gadgets over having a conversation or eating meals together? The more we spend time in the virtual world, the less connection we have with the family. Sometimes, we get too caught up in “connecting” that we tend to forget the people who mean the most to us. 

A family counselor may help you formulate a plan that lessens the use of gadgets in the household to increase physical interactions instead.

Trust Issues

Trust issues are a significant problem that causes division within the family. There are times when a couple fails to be honest with each other. While this can be resolved quickly by sitting down for a conversation, not addressing it may lead to a spiral of problems. Such problems may cause further lack of communication, distrust, and lack of support within the family. It also applies to children who always lie to their parents, making parents doubt what they say.

Depression

It is normal to seek some privacy and solitude when you’re at home. While wanting to enjoy some time alone is okay, it can turn alarming if you see signs of withdrawal from socializing. In some cases, this can be an early sign that they may be suffering from depression or other mental health issues. It can also be a result of falling victim to bullying or abuse, which family counseling can address.  

Addiction

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Any kind of addiction can have a significant impact on a family either in the short or long term. Children who witnessed or experienced addiction from a young age may suffer from its long-term effects. It may often lead to the development of mental and physical disorders. In cases like this, a family counselor may help address the root of the issue of a family member.

Here are some examples of addiction:

  • Substance addiction
  • Alcohol addiction
  • Gambling addiction 
  • Gaming addiction
  • Shopping addiction
  • Social media addiction

Violence

It’s normal to have arguments and quarrels in the household. However, if it turns into physical or verbal violence, the relationship may lead to an abusive path. Experiencing violence at home is the most severe issue among family problems. Thus, immediate counseling is necessary to help stop it from going.

A home should not be a place where people feel threatened. Unfortunately, violence destroys many families and relationships.

Financial Problems

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Financial shortage is a dominant reason why many families develop conflicts. For many parents, debt is the leading cause of their stress. Often, stressful financial situations turn into fights and blame games.

Families with substantial financial capacity also face this problem. If a family member feels they do not receive their fair share, they may feel cheated or disrespected. Families fighting over money can develop into long-term resentment against each other.

Conclusion

Whatever problem there is in the family, it is possible to overcome it by seeking help together.  Whether your loved one needs a diversion from their issue or counseling, the entire family will benefit from family counseling. Family counseling can help navigate those problems and give suggestions on how to deal with it properly.

Self-Realizations While In Isolation

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Due to the coronavirus, the government required all the citizens of specific states to self-isolate. You may go out to purchase essentials, but that’s it—after shopping, you need to return home immediately. However, I took the isolation order to heart; that’s why I did not leave the house for exactly 70 days.

Whenever I needed to buy groceries, I would fill my cart online and deliver the items at my doorstep. If I could not find stuff there, I could hire a local delivery person to get them from the store for me.

But the highlight of the quarantine was the things that I realized while staying isolated from everyone. Here they are:

I Don’t Need Too Many Friends

Before going into isolation, I could not stand not to talk with at least ten people I considered as friends. Some of them were neighbors and colleagues; others were former classmates in high school and college. I used to think that having as many friends as possible was the reason for my happiness.

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This idea merely changed when the quarantine orders came, and I could no longer see all my friends. The one I frequently at the lobby of the apartment building lived a floor above mine, but we could not chat for long. I managed to call the others almost every day, but it gradually decreased as the days passed.

 The change did not come because my friends stopped answering me, no. I just realized that I did not need too many friends on my side. Instead, I should be happy with one or two individuals who would never leave my side.

I Can Survive A Week Without Partying

I refuse to see myself as a party animal, although that’s a nickname that my family has been linking to me for years. They say that it is because I act like my week cannot be complete if I cannot go clubbing.

In truth, I cannot blame my loved ones for painting me that way in their minds. Ever since I turned 21 years old, I made an unspoken vow to party at least once a week. It was technically a reward for myself for getting through the weekdays. Besides, I enjoyed drinking and dancing with friends too much, so I did not want to pass up an opportunity to hit the clubs with them.

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Despite that, the quarantine forced me to stop partying with anyone. None of the bars and clubs that my friends and I used to visit were closed for an indefinite period. Even meeting them during the day became inadvisable. I am merely not complaining about it now because it has made me see that I can survive a week—or a month—without partying.

I Feel Better When I Eat Healthily

I am no different from other young adults who are trying to make it big in the metro. I work for morning till night on weekdays; I live in a tiny apartment with two roommates to be able to pay the rent. This setup does not bother me, to be honest, considering it is easy to eat at fast-food chains.

However, as everyone stayed at home due to the coronavirus, most restaurants in my city had to shut down. A handful of them was stubborn enough to remain open, but they could only handle a few clients every day. Thus, my roommates and I had no choice but to buy a portable gas stove and cook our meals.

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Was it effortless for us? No! Sometimes, we would eat scorched rice or soggy noodles; other times, we would have half-burnt-half-undercooked meat. But once we got the hang of cooking, we managed to cook healthy meals, which made me feel better than ever.

Final Thoughts

I cannot promise that I won’t go back to my old habits once the quarantine is 100% done. Still, I already know better than to overdo everything, so I won’t go crazy when it comes to friendships, parties, and fast foods.

Looking At Psychics From A Non-Psychic View

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I went to the 2019 Psychic Event and it was quite different. Any non-intuitive person would agree with me on that. The reason I went there was to accompany my friend who always shared to me about her “third eye.” She was gifted with the “sight” as she would say but as for me, I am not really a 100% believer of psychics and their craft. And besides, this topic is a taboo to many. So I decided to go with her on that event to see for myself what a psychic is all about.

Continue reading “Looking At Psychics From A Non-Psychic View”

Self-Awareness And Self-Love

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Learning about myself through the 2019 Self-Awareness Event was a positive move for me. I have not been myself for the past two decades, I could say, and that is because of loving the wrong person. My husband of twenty years recently left me for a younger woman, and I devoted myself to him and our two children, without thinking of myself. Like I said, I loved the wrong person. I should have loved myself the most.

Continue reading “Self-Awareness And Self-Love”

Life Lessons During Coronavirus Outbreak

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The coronavirus is one of the fiercest enemies you’ll encounter in this lifetime. Every country is practically fighting it by urging the citizens to hide in their homes and avoid going out unless they’re told that it’s safe to do so. Do you hear that? We are fighting by hiding.

Despite that, what else can we do but stay at home like we’re all told? It is better than going out without any vaccine to shield us from the coronavirus. At least, when we remain in one place for a long while, the virus cannot find us. And there’s no shame in retreating from a fight sometimes, especially if you don’t have the necessary weapons to win the battle.

I have thought of a few more life lessons besides that, including:

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Saving Up Is Good

For many years, people always tried to advise me on what to do with my hard-earned money. Some of them that I should save up as much of it as I could. Others told me than I didn’t have to do that at all. Instead, I could choose to invest my money in some businesses and watch it grow on its own.

Well, I feel thankful that I decided to do both of them. I have investments here and there, and then my savings account gets regular deposits.

I am especially grateful for the latter because I need not worry about not having work for at least a couple of months during the quarantine. I know that so many people around the globe are struggling financially because of the pandemic. Instead of waiting for monetary aids, I can even help others with my savings.

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Being An Introvert Is Not Bad These Days

My friends have always called me out for being an introvert. After all, they are the type of people who enjoy talking to strangers while I cannot even stand chatting with them for hours. I prefer to stay at home and be with my dogs instead of going out and socializing with people.

As it turns out, being an introvert is not a curse these days. Between my friends and I, I am the least bothered by this quarantine. I can spend an entire day in my garden doing quarantine while they are getting bored out of their minds. I never feel the need to break the rules; however, they come up with excuses to be able to go out.

Although I would never wish for my friends to contract the coronavirus, I knew that my introversion made me safer than anyone.

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You Can Learn Anything When You Have Nothing Much To Do

I realized this fact when I ran out of bread for the first time during the quarantine. I was never interested in baking, but my local bakery was closed. Then, I saw a YouTube tutorial about it and thought that I should give it a try.

Without the stay-at-home order, I may have never tried baking at all. But now I am aware that I can do it and it’s more fun than I have expected. It shows that you can learn anything when you are left with nothing much to do.

Final Thoughts

We all need to stop protesting about the lockdowns and quarantines that govern different parts of the globe. If it is challenging for some to stay at home, it must be 20 times more difficult for the government officials and frontline workers to try to save us all from the coronavirus. Besides, there’s no reason to complain too much if:

    • You have a comfortable house.
    • You can buy anything you need.
    • You can pick up any hobby you want.

Let’s all try to learn some valuable life lessons during this coronavirus outbreak. Agree?

When To Walk Out Of Client-Centered Therapy

Many professionals are engaged in providing services in the field of psychotherapy. These are the individuals who had gone through the required education and training before they were able to get the license to provide therapy for clients. Unfortunately, not all therapists have what it takes to help others. Some of them can be difficult to deal with. As such, instead of helping clients feel better, they may make matters worse.

 

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If you are going to try therapy for the first time, be sure that you know the top qualities that your therapist must-have. Find time to research him so that you will not make a wrong move in selecting such a professional. Here are the top signs that indicate the necessity of standing up on your ground and finding the courage to walk out of a client-centered therapy session:

 

Your Therapist Does Not Have Empathy

 

One of the qualities that an excellent therapist or counselor must have is empathy. He must know how to make clients feel that the latter’s concerns or issues are being heard. If this is something that your professional mental health expert does not possess, then do not hesitate to drop his services. You will never feel okay about the situation as long as such a professional will continue to provide poor services.

 

 

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There Is Difficulty In Communication

 

Are you not comfortable in discussing issues and problems with your therapist? Do you have many reservations that you keep to yourself during the therapy sessions? If you answered a big yes to these inquiries, then the best thing to do is to leave such a professional. Always keep in mind that the foundation of a successful client-therapist relationship is the ability of both parties to communicate freely. Hence, if this element is not available in your professional engagement with a therapist, then walk away today.

 

 You Cannot Get Along Well

 

Does your therapist make you feel that he is superior over you? Is he challenging and frustrating to deal with? Take note that you must never force any interaction with someone who is only giving additional stress in your life. The moment you discover that your beliefs are different from your therapist, then do not feel sorry if you want to walk away. Just remember always to check if there is a contract or not.

 

 

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The Sessions Are Highly Expensive

 

If you think that you can no longer afford the services of a counselor or therapist, then feel free to let him go. Keep in mind that therapy sessions can be expensive. You must have a sufficient amount of money before you book an appointment with a professional. Otherwise, you might not be able to get the best value for the services that you pay for. When doing this, be sure to inform your therapist why you have to do it. Be polite in talking to him about this matter. The primary goal is to make him understand that the ultimate reason for leaving is your failure to support the professional fees.

 

Just because you had a bad experience with a therapist recently does not mean that client-centered therapy is not effective. You must still give it a try!

Anger Management Counseling: How To Prevent Your Temper From Ruining Your Health

 

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Getting ill is expensive these days. Every appointment with a doctor can cost above a hundred dollars. If there is any medical procedure you need to undergo, the amount may increase by ten- or hundred-fold too. That, of course, is apart from the price that comes with each bottle of medicine prescribed by the physician.

In case you watch your diet and exercise regularly, though, you might wonder why you still catch a disease. Well, one suspect in such a scenario is the uncontrollable rage. This conflicting emotion can push you to overthink about whatever you hear and see; thus, you stress yourself out more often than not. Putting too much pressure on your system, if you must know, can lower your immunity and make your body a great host for bacteria and viruses.

To understand how to prevent your temper from ruining your health, here are some suggestions from anger management counseling specialists.

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  1. Disperse It Before It Explodes

The fact that you ought to realize is that you are profoundly different from a candle wick that becomes lit as soon as fire touches it. No, human beings are more comparable to charcoal, which only glows in the beginning but can ignite into flames once it gets too hot.

All we’re trying to say here is that there are indications you can pick up before an anger explosion takes place. Your face might look red; your heart might beat a lot faster than usual as if you are running in the marathon. It is possible for you to grind your teeth or dig your nails into your palms as well. Aside from those, harsh words can rush through your mind and want to come out of your mouth at that instant.

The only way to disperse your fury, however, is knowing when these signs show up. Then, you’ll be able to regain your composure and avoid exploding.

  1. Think If Anger Is What You’re Feeling For Real

Assuming that a person is knowledgeable about the emoticons or emojis on their smartphone, it does not guarantee that he or she also understands every emotion that they experience. For instance, if you are already tired of waiting, you might express your impatience by bursting out in rage. In case you feel disappointed about the slow service at a restaurant, it is not beyond you either to harass the crew and make an embarrassing scene in public.

Whenever you do things like that, you should remember that the people you get angry with are not the only ones who become judged by the prying eyes. You are too. That is why you need to assess your real emotions and react to a situation accordingly.

 

 

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  1. Seek Psychological Guidance

Considering you have tried all the alternative tricks to handle your temper but to no avail, then you should obtain anger management counseling. It is a type of therapy that can help you identify the root of your issues, as well as figure out the best techniques to switch to Zen mode at your will. The counselor will not require you to stay in counseling forever, so make sure to get it if you can’t deal with the side effects of uncontrollable rage anymore.

 

Keep the tips above in your memory bank the next time you feel angry. Good luck!

What To Do In Client-Centered Therapy

Seeing a therapist or counselor for the first time can be awkward, exciting and challenging all at the same time. You know why you need to see this professional, but you have no idea how to act once he is around. It is only normal to entertain negative thoughts or doubts about your first appointment. The truth is that each client-centered therapist understands why you feel that way.

 

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In this article, we are going to list down or enumerate some tips on what to do during a therapy session. Make sure to remember these:

 

Be Respectful

 

It can be easy to feel judged or misunderstood during a meeting with a therapist. You may think that he does not support you at all, especially if the professional keeps on challenging your views. However, this does not give you a right to be disrespectful to him. As much as possible, be open to different views or opinions about your current situation. Welcome the comments of the client-centered therapist because he only wants the best for you.

 

Be Cooperative

 

Stop giving your therapist a hard time in dealing with you. If you want to recover from a mental illness or reach your potentials fully, then be prepared to cooperate during the therapy sessions. Make an effort to connect or reach out to your counselor or therapist. Do not be reliant on his services because the reality is that without your cooperation, it would still be impossible to acquire the goals of client-centered therapy.

 

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Be Open-Minded

 

There are times when you may think that your therapist does not know what he is doing. This will make you question his strategies or methods in helping you become a better version of yourself. Unfortunately, this kind of thinking will only drag you down even more. Instead of constantly going against him, try to have an open mind. Keep yourself open to different possibilities. You will never know what is great for you until you try it out.

 

Be Truthful

 

Every client in therapy sessions is reminded to remain honest and truthful at all times. Keep in mind that the therapist cannot help you if you keep a lot of things from him. Sometimes, all you must do is to let go of your thoughts and emotions. Learn how to remove your reservations so that you could move forward finally. This is the primary reason why it is essential to find a therapist whom you can trust or be comfortable with. Look for someone whom you can open up quickly and honestly.

 

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Searching for an expert in client-centered therapy can be a tedious process. There are many professionals engaged in this field, but only a few of them are qualified to handle clients effectively. As such, find time to research more about the available therapists in your area and get in touch with the one who has an established name.

 

Find Your Self-Worth Through Music Therapy

 

Believing in yourself is not easy. Every day, a lot of people deal with personal issues which may affect how we exude confidence and how we see ourselves. We have to learn how to value our selves so that we begin to trust others.

 

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People tend to be depressed if we don’t realize our self-worth. Without self-worth, we will think that we don’t deserve any good things that are happening in our lives. Having the right mindset for self-worth is essential.

 

Realizing Your Self-Worth

Having self-worth means being able to see your real value as a person and accepting it. Each of us has our way of valuing themselves and assessing their worth. A lot of people fail to see their true value and become content with what they currently have.

 

Understanding your self-worth means valuing your innate self. It focuses more on how do you think you are as a person rather than what you do. Our lives can become easier when we realize our value. It may lead to healthier relationships with people around us.

 

In today’s age of social media, self-worth is not easy to achieve. We tend to measure our self-worth against those of others, and it is not a good thing. We should be paying attention to the intrinsic value instead.

 

Importance of Music Therapy

With our struggle to fully grasp our self-worth, there are different types of therapies available to aid us. Music Therapy is one of the treatments that can help us in our journey to find our true self-worth. As a universal language, music also has its healing power.

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Music Therapy can be used to address various cognitive, social, and emotional issues in people. For people who are not good or are not comfortable with words or talking, music may be their outlet to express what they honestly feel.  Simply listening to music or making music can give an avenue for expression and communication between a person and a therapist.

 

Self-Worth and Music Therapy

According to a study, music therapy can be used to improve self-worth and lower depression significantly. Depending on the person’s needs, music therapy can either be receptive or active. Receptive, in a way that people dance or listen to music; Active meaning it includes composing tunes or playing instruments.

 

As music gives us a calming effect, it enables us to think more clearly, sway away from negative thoughts, and allowing us to realize our true value. It also reduces any stress and anxiety we may feel. Music allows our minds to be soothed and great lyrics may help us become attached to the songs as well.

 

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Often, when we hear our favorite song on the radio, or we hear a new song that we like, our moods are lifted. It is just one of the positive effects that music can bring us. Music has a powerful impact on most people especially if we can relate to the lyrics.

 

Realizing your self-worth does not only mean that you know your strengths but accepting your weaknesses as well. We must learn how to believe in ourselves confidently. Music can be an avenue to help us understand our self-worth and in turn, giving us the full potential to achieve our dreams and aspirations.