You’ve been meaning to join the team since you transferred to this place, but you just can’t. Your family and friends keep telling you that you’re very much qualified – even better than half of the team members. Although, you just can’t shake off the feeling that you might embarrass yourself. You’re almost convinced that you’re just not good enough, and you hate yourself for that.

Keeping grudges towards yourself is a sure-fire way to self-destruction. This is what people usually feel when they’ve experienced rejection, like not getting the job you’ve always wanted or not being accepted in the society. Abandonment also causes one to think twice about oneself. When someone you love leaves you for another, for personal or financial reasons, it greatly affects how you perceive yourself and your capabilities. Other than finding professional help online in dealing with feelings of self-hate, here are some effective ways to develop self-love.

How to Love Yourself

Stop comparing yourself to others. Sometimes checking out Facebook, Twitter and Instagram too much aggravates self-hate thoughts simply because you often see the great things happening to a friend, or worst, to a foe! That’s just depressing, right? Not that you want your friend to fail, but you see what and where he is now, and then you start thinking about what and why you’re not. They may be the executive of a reputable firm now, but guess what – they don’t get to see and take care of the kids the way you do. You are not perfect, and so are they. Truly, the only person you should compare to is yourself. Achieve what you can according to your own criteria, and not others. No matter how small your achievement, celebrate it. It’s always well deserved.



Respect your body by giving it what it needs, not what it wants. Do you sometimes wonder why your mood gets worse when you eat too much of what is prohibited for you? This is because consuming too much sugar or alcohol when we’re a little low or depressed would actually lead to more feelings of depression, and eventually self-hate. Giving your body the right nutrients that it needs boosts your self-confidence and encourages you to love yourself more. Exercise and fill your mind and body with happy hormones, the endorphins. Get a body scrub once a month or twice if you want. Stay fit. Take care of your body and learn to love everything about it.


Be kind to others. “Doing unto others what you want others to do unto you” is one hell of an effective quote to live by in every day of your life. Be grateful for the little things that people show you – the “good morning’s”, the smiles, the show of friendliness. These are things that matter, more like tests of character. They remind you that you can never go wrong with doing something right for someone, no matter how small. Being kind to others helps us to feel good about ourselves and to the people around us. People may love you for it, and people may not. Might as well be you.



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